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You mean like...a library of people making different expressions? Bodies in Motion has a small one. And I know of at least one book that compiles photos of different people making a variety of expressions. It's called Facial Expressions: A Visual Reference for Artists by Mark Simon.
I am so sorry you are going through this. I have lived large swathes of your story and the pain, frustration, and insecurity you're experiencing are emotions I am all too familiar with battling. I can tell you it is absolutely not hopeless, that it will be okay, but that, I found, only goes so far when you've got no idea where to start.
Rather than giving you a wall-of-text prescription, I have just one suggestion based off reading your post. Ever seen a coloring book for adults? Here's one example, and you can find others or even Google pages you can print yourself: http://www.amazon.com/Adult-Coloring-Book-Relieving-Patterns/dp/1941325122
Buy a book (or print some pages), get your favorite coloring media out, and start coloring. Seriously. If you can do it on a regular basis, that's even better. Just...do that. Start there, and see what happens.
There are benefits from learning from this book, but it's mostly for rendering. If you wanna get better at drawing specifically I recommend Drawing People by Barbra Bradley : https://www.amazon.com/Drawing-People-Portray-Clothed-Figure/dp/1581803591
Get Gary Faigin's Complete Guide to Facial Expression. I picked up the book years ago and it's invaluable for identifying the key components of facial expression. You'll still need to be able to draw features and forms, but I took a look at your work and you'll be just fine.
Here's a video that does a quick flipthrough to give you an idea.
Drawing People by Barbra Bradley: link
Constructive Anatomy by George Bridgman : Link
For Fantasy stuff I would check out Frank Frazetta and Dean Cornwell.
I'd post some books but they are either expensive or a bad print. So just go check out their art on the internet.
If you want more suggestions just ask
Pencils and Process: Thoughts on Returning to Art, Portraits, and Colored Pencil Painting. Free on Amazon Kindle until Sunday night (May 19th) at midnight. https://www.amazon.com/Pencils-Process-Thoughts-Returning-Portraits-ebook/dp/B07Q9YQJJ5/
No the problem is with the expression, not the rendering. I think you didn't commit to an expression, so you did sort of a neutral one, but it comes off as jovial.
You should pick this up and run through it. This is one of the best expression books, because it doesn't use actors faking emotions for the photo-shoot. These are reproductions of candid photographs of expressions, so they're real: https://www.amazon.com/Artists-Complete-Guide-Facial-Expression/dp/0823004325
Have a look at that.
The most useful thing I have found is to cultivate a habit of smiling whenever you greet someone or pass someone you recognize, whenever they're speaking to you about something neutral or positive, or any other time that you're at a loss how to express happiness or friendliness. (I developed this habit because my resting face apparently looks forlorn, and I was tired of people asking me what was wrong.)
Smiling makes you seem more approachable, and it tends to be infectious; seeing you look happy helps other people feel happy, and people who feel happy around you will naturally gravitate to you, even if you're quiet or shy.
Practice realistic smiles. It's not enough to curl your mouth; you have to smile with your eyes (in fact, you can do almost anything with your mouth and still have it read as joy if you smile with your eyes). There are different muscles involved with real smiles and fake-looking smiles, too (for example, showing your lower teeth is indicative of a fake smile).
If, like me, you struggle a bit with understanding facial expressions and the muscles involved in making them, this is a great resource (not just for artists, despite the title). This book can also help you read other people's subtle expressions, which aids being more empathetic and likeable.
So I think everything about your image is extra good. It's very well executed.
I have one suggestion that I think can boost drawings like this a bit. It has to do with capturing more intense and nuanced emotion: https://www.amazon.com/Artists-Complete-Guide-Facial-Expression/dp/0823004325
In this book, the writer collected candid photographs of people actually experiencing the range of human emotions, then drew them to throw off the copyright. There is also musculature analysis. I can't stress enough that this book will help you better capture subtle emotion, but also will show you how to draw whole-hog emotions like extreme anguish and stuff. Just looking at his drawings are very stirring. Just looking at the hysterically laughing faces make you smile. It's funny how well it works.
This process of capturing people "in the moment" is vastly superior to using a studio model who is "trying" to make a sad face. The book goes into depth on how there are "fake smiles" vs "real smiles" for example.
This is really a game-changer for artists who want to emotionally affect the audience. I've read this book a few times and from that I could give you some pointers that would really make the expression more convincing. Things off the top of my head are: - Its unlikely the forehead would be smooth when the eyebrows are furrowed like that. - During even mild sadness the chin compresses, and draws the mouth down. Your mouth is pretty neutral.
The other day I was recommended /r/prettygirlsuglyfaces for people making expressions that are atypical and not beautified. Pause a movie mid action sequence and you'll also get some like these. My high school had a copy of this book if you have some cash to spend. Good luck! :)
That's amazing! Having your own car is a huge first step :D
Here's some to take a look at sometime. They're really relaxing.
It's great that you're saving up some cash though, that's really good progress you're making :)
Yea, I'm doing Secret Santa for the second time this year and I'm looking forward to it.
I was thinking of something focused specifically on self care, like coloring books, hot chocolate, self improvement books...but I guess a exchange focused on people struggling with anxiety and depression might be weird. Whatever, I'm just disappointed I can't suggest and vote, like I've said.
I have this, and people have been pretty amazed at my ability to draw people with pretty much zero practice but paying attention to detail.
http://www.amazon.com/Draw-People-Discover-Drawing-Series/dp/0891346570
I ran across this book the other day. The author is a police forensic artist. Claims to teach this kind of stuff in a week of full-time instruction.
If you do end up leaning toward the game industry, id recommend a LOT more quick sketches, maybe just work on 1 character for awhile and get a lot of sketches of them doing different faces. Doing real looking expressions will always be needed no matter the art style.
I've met a few people who made it into pixar and such and they all tell me art directors care more about your sketches than your renders, they care more about your creativity than your skill. Although skill is good.
DO NOT draw WoW stuff to get a job at blizzard, your stuff is great, but never use their style to get in with them, why would they want what they already have, if you want to get into a company you need to offer something they don't.
So I would research what jobs you would go for, find their art, concept, in game, anything and find their weak point. Then perfect it in your own style.
Sorry if this goes on too long, but I myself tried for a short time to make it as an artist, but the schools burnt me out and I haven't drawn in almost a year, they were not teaching what I wanted and my art went nowhere because I felt bored, and couldn't afford any other type of school. So now on to my engineering degree!
Please don't take this as a bad crit, honestly your stuff is great.
Also if you want to be in a creative position go 2d, 3d from what i hear end up just doing what they are told rather than what they want, in the forms of looks and whatnot.
I think you do a great job building believable monster-like characters, but I feel that your figures are suffering. I'd recommend picking up Drawing the Human Head By Burne Hogarth and maybe even his other book Dynamic Figure Drawing. Hogarth uses a really exaggerated, almost comic-book style, but he does this to more clearly illustrate his points. Take what he says from these books and relax some of the rules so it tailors to your style.
I think you have a very fun and recognizable style, stick with it!