What is the crowd's opinion of Thoughts and Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life?

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I'm new to all this, honestly, but the idea is to categorize key life value's that are important to you. You then compare your life's current key value's and then make adjustments. For example, say OP said one of his key value's was "fitness or health" OP would write: "I feel like shit because I'm drinking, I'm not eating right and I'm over weight."

OP would then write out what they would do to fix it - go to the gym, eat better, and exercise. Then OP needs to do it and the thought of doing it (mobilizing) reduces the feelings of uselessness and all that bullshit associated with depression. Keep doing this until your existing key value's match the ones you wanted. It's not a be all end all and it's not a fix for professional help or medication to level your mood out. But if you're interested, please check out this book. Depression is chapter - 11, 2 ,3, 4, 12, 20, 15, 16, and 9 (in that order).

Good luck!

What you're doing is called mobilizing and it's a core skillset for cognitive behavior therapy when dealing with depression. Keep it up, I'm making my own list.

EDIT - Typo

EDIT EDIT - Sweet Christmas, this blew up. For those of you asking, here is book I got this from - https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Harbinger-Self-Help-Workbook/dp/1608822087

If you want a little more information about mobilizing specifically as it relates to that book, click here.

/me raises hands

I started having panic attacks years ago, really bad, mostly at night. The spasms gave me bad back pain as well. Talking to a therapist helped me, but she also put me in touch with this workbook, which is basically DIY CBT. Quelling panic attacks takes practice but is totally doable - practicing outside of panic attacks is also helpful, but usually you have nothing else to do (or physically can't). Keep notes - if you manage to get from a 9 to a 7 on the panicking scale, awesome! 7 is not fun either, but it's an indication that something might be worth practicing more and putting in the toolkit.

You mentioned CBT hasn't helped much in the past though - have you heard of progressive muscle relaxation? You work through all your muscles and tense them for 7 seconds or so, and then release all the tension. Could help since you mentioned a lot of physical symptoms like I had.

I'm sorry it's been so rough lately. You're definitely not alone, and reaching out is totally a good, brave thing to do about it. :)

What you're doing is called mobilizing and it's a core skillset for cognitive behavior therapy when dealing with depression. Keep it up, I'm making my own list.

EDIT - Typo

EDIT EDIT - Sweet Christmas, this blew up. For those of you asking, here is book I got this from - https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Harbinger-Self-Help-Workbook/dp/1608822087

If you want a little more information about mobilizing specifically as it relates to that book, click here.

It sounds like you know what's going on logically, but when it comes to emotions of course it's going to be tough. My therapist recommended this workbook for getting over being an ACON stuff and you may find it helpful: https://www.amazon.ca/Thoughts-Feelings-Taking-Control-Moods/dp/1608822087.

Oh, yeah. There are tons of people. Looks like you're getting lots of good advice in this thread from them.

I manage mine with exercise, better eating habits, cognitive behavioural therapy (the book I still refer to) and mindfulness practice. I've seen therapists in the past. Different stuff works for different people.

Crying all the time isn't fun. Having your life pruned down sucks. Just because it becomes your normal, and perhaps you've found ways of coping, doesn't mean you gotta keep dealing. You deserve relief from those feelings. It doesn't have to be "bad enough" to get help, and it is never too late either. :)

Here is a really great CBT workbook, it really has nothing to do with polyamory, but I think the issues you're outlining above are really healthy relationships issues. https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1608822087/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Hey dude. I'm sorry you're feeling this way right now.

You've made a good list of things that are subpar, and you want to change. You don't have to fix everything right away, or fix everything right now. Fighting against depression is a pain in the ass. Sometimes meditation, or gratitude practice, or exercise doesn't help that day, but you know what? It's not always about moving forward, or success - it's about just keeping on and trying new shit, when the shit you're doing isn't working for you. And sometimes seeking help when you're at a total loss - if you're not comfortable opening up to friends or family, a therapist might be a really helpful person to have on your side. I know I'm a DIY kind of person, and I found this book really helpful.

I think it's hard to make really specific recommendations to a situation, because you'll always know your situation better than anybody here. A lot of feeling alright is changing the relationship with you have with yourself, and how you narrate your life. When I'm beating myself up particularly hard, I try to imagine what I would tell a friend in the same situation.

Anyways, best of luck. You're certainly not alone.

What you're doing is called mobilizing and it's a core skillset for cognitive behavior therapy when dealing with depression. Keep it up, I'm making my own list.

EDIT - Typo

EDIT EDIT - Sweet Christmas, this blew up. For those of you asking, here is book I got this from - https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Harbinger-Self-Help-Workbook/dp/1608822087

If you want a little more information about mobilizing specifically as it relates to that book, click here.

I completely agree with this assessment. Really, any rules/boundaries/etc. should be based on not being a shitty human being, not what some guru says. If you want to deal with jealousy, which seems to be the most common problem, there are better books written by real psychiatrists. Jealousy and other negative emotions may have a foundation that isn't even related to your current relationships, but to childhood trauma or baggage from past relationships. My therapist recommended this workbook and I'll pass it on here. https://www.amazon.ca/Thoughts-Feelings-Taking-Control-Moods/dp/1608822087

All those things can be learned though, just takes some practice and finding like-minded people to hang out and practice your social skills. A lot of people right now don't have a plan for their life due to the craziness of this world, so you're not alone. Even if you can't afford therapy, you can work on this stuff. Check out Healthy Gamer GG (https://youtu.be/J4M5Den94M0). Therapy workbook you can buy and follow on your own: https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Taking-Control-Moods/dp/1608822087

You got this!

Most of the concepts referenced can be learned from the book [Thoughts and Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life

](https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Taking-Control-Moods/dp/1608822087&sa=U&ved=2ahUKEwisnrqckobzAhU6i8MKHaNqCiAQFnoECAYQAg&usg=AOvVaw2hdKtb3dob6wgmmafEdH5q) specifically the sections on Automatic Thoughts and how to counter them. Although this book is from the 1980s, it is still relevant and helpful today.

This is the workbook I have referred to many a time - I know access for mental health support can be very challenging.

This page has some stuff on proper condom usage. Not using them consistently, touching the wrong side to the tip of the penis and then flipping it, using one that is too small or too big, bad storage, that's all imperfect stuff.

FAM is can be helpful for learning about your body - I never had a 'late' period on it, and seeing my basal body temperature made it clear progesterone was causing my symptoms. I've had great experiences with IUDs, although BCPs were not my friend. If you have bad side effects on something, you can find something else, but most people do find something that works adequately well for themselves. Anyways. Best of luck. :)

Sometimes we all need to offload some baggage. If you ever want someone to message, feel free to message whenever.

I've been through around a decade long depression. I get it. If you need more concrete help, I recommend looking into a mindfulness and/or CBT practice. I used these two books on recommendation of my psychologist.

It helped, eventually. Took a little while, and I still slip up. There will be a few days or even weeks where I don't practise and I slip into another episode. Then I pick it back up. It gets easier to pick back up each time though, and the periods of relapsing get shorter.

That's good on the lower-fat from what I understand about gallbladders. Does your employer have an EAP/employee assistance program?

Yeah. It's hard. Sudden, involved illness really does shift your perspective. And internal distress is extra mysterious in terms of what's going on in there. Anxiety and physical symptoms are a dumb cycle - anxiety/stress causes your body to be on alert all the time, and your body being in pain causes you anxiety. Thankfully, you don't have to pinpoint the exact problem to have things improve. If you can reduce your anxiety, or your discomfort, it's progress. Even if it feels like a total slog.

Things that could help physical symptoms:

• Keeping a food diary to see what tends to upset your stomach.
• Walks after meals to aid in digestion, small meals, other general GI-stuff
• Having a little emergency kit of helpful medication to pack around. Anti-nausea medication (Gravol/dramamine) actually helps with non-motion nausea, which is nice. People like fresh ginger too. Maybe something for heartburn. If you can stop what is hurting, then maybe the idea that is a heart problem is easier to let go.
• Continue talking to doctors as needed - it sucks, I know. Finding a good, helpful doctor is really hard, let alone one you like. Keep monitoring heart situation.

Maybe some stuff to investigate with anxiety (this could be a very long list - it's a good idea to try something for a bit before deciding if it is helpful or not):

• Reading a book. This one is my favourite "Fix your own problems" sorta book.
• Breathing, meditation, some method of practice for calming yourself down. Because being calm is a better place to think things through from.
• Practice pushing out of the comfort zone a little. It's really.. easy to get sad when you feel like anxiety is ruling your life. So if you can scout out bathrooms, and go out, have a bit of fun, and prove to yourself you can? Big stuff.

Depression is hard. I don't have a lot of advice in that department, because it can be really hard to dig yourself out. Harder than it needs to be. And it sounded like you were embarrassed in your first post, but I want to say these are all just normal person problems. If you open up a little, often people will say "oh yeah, me too" and have some really decent advice, or help you feel less alone. You may have a friend or family person who could bounce some ideas around with - people who know you better than internet strangers.

Anyways. Hope things ease up. Take care. :)

CBT uses exposure therapies to deal with obsessional thinking. I know sitting around purposefully thinking all the thoughts that are bothering you is counter-intuitive, but it works quite well through desensitization.

Ideally you'd have a therapist help you with learning and implementing the techniques. That being said there are some great workbooks out there you can use on your own (or combined with a therapist). I own Thoughts and Feelings. It's recommended treatment for obsessional thinking that causes high levels of anxiety is flooding.

It's the main treatment recommended for obsessional thoughts in Thoughts & Feelings the CBT workbook I have. It's a great book. Has CBT techniques for a whole range of issues.